My Holiday

WALT - We are learning to write,edit and re craft our writing.

To write my story I made a plan at the top of the page. Then I wrote my story an underneath. The
green writing shows the editing I have done and the red parts show what mr masters helped me

withe

cosin.

                                         Breaking bons

                                                                                         4 wheeler

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Plane

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tow of my cousins came up for the holidays. They wanted to go on the 4

Two

wheeler. My dad let them. But my cousin broke 1 of his wrists. It was sade.

                                                                         one sad

I will tell you the store. He was going over the bridge. We have 3 bridges.  

                        stoy                                                                  three

1 is scene. 2 are fat. He went over 1 of the fat ones.

one          two                    one

Than he hit a bit of congckerit. He couldn't ster

Then                        Concrete                      

the 4 wheeler! He jomt of it! The 4 wheeler crashes into a tree. He is

                   jumped off                     crashed was

locke to be alive because he neele drove into a drain that is vere depe.

lucky                                 nearle        very deep

That reminds me of when we tjockt a doll in the drain. It was fun we sade

                                              chucked      sad

to tova (my sister) that it was swimming in the drain and it wanted to go

   T

fishing. Than we frod it in bamboo trees and it got stuck up in there, than

                         threw                                                                        then

when it came done it landed in dog poop. Than we celendet it in the drain.

                                                                 Then cleaned

He got clen soprisingle. Than the doll did tricks on the trampoline.

         Clean       

Clean         couldn’t threw       then very deep  concrete

Jumped       off lucky      nearly Chucked   crashed

Story       sad one       two three surprisingly     was

I liked doing this work. It was fun because I could tell the whole world about my holiday.
What was your favourite part? I hope you liked it.